Wednesday, January 11, 2006

i ain't in the best of mood these days. some of you may know why, some not. some may think they know, but they don't. i admit i'm a hard nut to crack, don't think you know me inside out because you don't. and the saddest truth is that, i don't even understand myself so what more you, you and you.

the smile you see, the laughter u hear, the little conversations i have with anyone. i find it all so hypocritical. like, i do it for the sake of it. its just me. that explains why i'm home like right after school today. i just don't feel like socializing. my world is full of myself, everything is about me, me and me. right.

i just feel so disheartened each time i think about it. should i stay or should i go? the obligations and compulsions just kills it all. but, i still want something out of it. don't question me, or rather anyone else but yourself. really, just question yourself.

i found the reason why i busied myself so much. maybe not the whole reason, but part of it. and i realise i'm the biggest clown here. i can only laugh at myself in the end. period.

tmr's my free day. but, cp training at 8.30am. meeting at 4.15pm. db training at 6.15pm. i've done it before so whats this to me.

looking forward to friday. i need to unwind. k-lunching, retail therapy and absolutely pure nonsense with shmay and shray. hurhur. in case you are wondering why their names like that ah, tts the consequence of my bad typing. which resulted in the 3 of us having new names, and mine is, shng. *shrugs*

alright, my medicine is taking effect, i need to sleep. sleep my worries away, sleep my troubles away. as if i have.

No comments: